No more tears! :)

Today we received our most awaited letter (at least for every one in our company). I recall last year, I wrote about greeting the fiscal year and rating with a smile. Well, I'm smiling. :) (Thank you Lord!) Not that I'm completely satisfied of what was in the letter especially the numbers in it, but at least I've proven myself I'm worthy of something. 

Yey! :) 

Tears are good stress reliever :)

I am female, and yes I use that as an excuse whenever I feel like nothing can calm me but a good cry. Today, after 4 years of going through the same process, I cried. I was not promoted. 

That sounded childish, but it's not. (of course, I'd say it's not) I'm not after the salary increase that comes along with it because I got my share of that. It's more of self worth, actually. Of knowing your're doing good, that you are excelling in what you do. Today I cried because I felt stupid, and having been a tutor and lecturer for more than 6 years before becoming a developer, for me that's the worst feeling ever. 

I couldn't even post anything in Facebook, because I wanted to be happy for my friends who leveled up and I am. I just couldn't give a warm congratulations now because I feel bad for myself. No, I'm not envious and no I am not comparing myself to others. I am comparing myself to me, and I wanted so bad to be a better version of me. 

I've cried. I feel better. I've identified my weaknesses. I have plans on how to improve and will implement them as soon as I can. 

Moving forward. :) 

Rating, see you next fiscal year with a smile. :)

Comfort in a paper bag

I have been on a special leave since May 7 as I underwent myomectomy the following day. I was supposed to go back to work last June 11 but my OB extended my rest for another month so I'm still under house arrest until July 8.

Some may think it's a good thing to just be at home for 2 solid months but for someone like me who has been working since I was a student, it's quite boring especially that I have to endure sticky hot days sitting alone with nothing to do. Since I am expected to rest, I couldn't go to the mall - well I did twice within my leave hehe just to save our electric bill from AC consumption. I tried to be productive but to no avail, my everyday routine would be to eat, surf the net, cook dinner and sleep (very late).

I feel bad. So I phoned my best bud 8MCDO and in less than 30 minutes my comfort lunch arrived.

They say calories make you feel happy. Hope this one works :(

McDonalds Metro Manila Delivery 
Hotline: 8MCDO (86236)

Life crisis on a gloomy morning

As much as I want to make this first post light and fluffy, it seems it won't be. My mood must have been affected by the weather today. It's drizzling outside and at 7.30 am the sky looks like it's 2 hours late of light. I'm not a morning person but today I decided to wake up early for 2 things: 1. to prepare for hubby's breakfast and 2. to hopefully sleep early tonight as I have been suffering from insomnia. My parting from the bed before 11 am (which is the usual since I am on leave from work) is not the reason why I couldn't even fake a smile today. It's because I had this dream which included my parents (who are both senior citizens) driving a rented, old and broken car to get me to a wedding. I felt sad not because it's old but because they have to rent it. We still don't have a car you see. No, don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to be just maarte. I'm fine with commuting. It's just that I promised myself I'd buy them one when I start working just so they don't have to ask relatives to carpool with them during reunions or weddings, so they don't have to wait for a cab while all others pass them by in cars to get from the church to the reception or cemetery. I want them to have the comfort of just having to stand and wait for me to drive them to anywhere they need to go. But I still can't. After almost 6 years of working (which includes the 2 years I was a working student) I haven't saved for a second hand car. :(

Let's go blame Mr. Sun for this life crisis because he refuses to shine today. But on second thought, let's not point fingers on anything nor anyone. This will pass and Mr. Sun will soon be beaming, I hope. As they say, Happiness is a choice so I am choosing to be happy.

Hello World!